By: Dr. Andrea Goddard
There’s still some time before school begins but starting the conversation early is helpful for the transition, especially for younger kids. Every child is different so yours might do fine without any preparation but for others, especially if they tend to be more stressed and anxious, they need support. Without an adult to ease the transition from summer to school, children can become more anxious or worried.
In my work as a child psychologist, I’ve seen that when children are stressed and anxious, this can affect their learning and behavior. They may act out more in class, or have a hard time socializing. In those situations, parents or guardians can miss out on what’s going on because their child can be filled with so many conflicting worries that there’s too much to talk about at once. And if your child can’t cope with the stress of going back to school, the consequences become more significant such as in the form of learning challenges. It’s easier overall to talk about going back to school before it happens.
For younger kids, supporting the transition means describing what the classroom will look like, who their teachers are, and the drop-off and pick-up routine. If your child has never been to the school before, some schools will let you visit in advance. If that’s not possible, looking at pictures can help. I also recommend writing a social story. Parents or guardians can create a plausible version of what going back to school will be like. It could be something such as, “Your teachers will be Ms. Robins and Mr. Daniels. There will be 12 kids in your class and you know the kids already from pre-school. I’ll give you a hug every day when I drop you off and a kiss when I pick you up.” You can flesh the story out as much or as little as you want.
For middle- and high-school students, back-to-school preparation is making sure they have everything they need and asking how they feel about going into the next grade. This is an opportunity to spend quality time with your child to let them express whatever they want to express about going back to school. It could be they’re nervous, which is normal, but maybe they’re also excited about what’s ahead.
For all kids, no matter their age, my top recommendation as a child psychologist to support the transition back to school is: Go to school at least once. That could be driving by, walking around, or walking in it if you’re able. This helps with orientation and any initial reactivity to the new environment. Somatically, kids have acclimated to being away from school so physically going to the school helps their bodies adjust to being in school again.
The Back-to-School Transition Timeline
In my experience as a child psychologist, here is the timeline to support the back-to-school transition:
- Three to four weeks in advance, request academic support if you know your child will need that. This is for individualized education programs (IEPs) or 504s. Speak with the school counselor or principal about setting up a meeting for the IEP or 504 to get that process started.
- Two to three weeks ahead of time, start to adjust the sleep schedule to match going back to school.
If you find your child is overly anxious, or doesn’t want to go to school and struggles to explain why, it can be helpful to talk to a child psychologist such as myself. I can help you and your child develop skills and coping strategies to manage their feelings and get more comfortable.
My goal as a North Shore child psychologist is to be a resource for you and your family. If you’d like to work together for child therapy, contact us to schedule a free phone consultation or give us a call at (773) 322-1363.